Monday, December 29, 2008

Beauty is only skin deep


If this story was not so typical of today's world then it would be really sad.

You have to admit,the woman in the picture above is finer than a pair of legs would be to a quaddroplegic.

However...

Her story makes me think of the way people are treated because of their looks.

The better you look, the better you will be treated in today's world.

A famous beauty pageant winner getting caught up with drug dealers and gang bangers?

Who would have thunk it?

Would she have made the headlines if she was ugly and poor?

I think not.

Now I must admit that I consider myself to be a decent looking man. There are some things I want to get fixed, like my teeth, I need braces, I also need to get in better shape, I lost my 2 pack about 10 years ago, but other than that, I have no problem getting attention from the ladies that I encounter on a daily basis.

I get told on the regular that I am a very sexy Black Man.

But I have to ask...

What is real Beauty?

Why is it so hard to see real Beauty?

Looks are the first thing a person notices when they encounter someone, but why do people (me included) automatically assume that because a person is fine that they are above reproach?

Why do we assume that a good-looking person can do no wrong?

Personality is not what gets attention, it is looks.
When you first meet a person you could give a damn about personality, all you see is how attractive you think they are.

Most ugly people do not stand a chance in this world if they have nothing else to fall back on.

I fall into this category of judging people based on the way they look.
It is wrong and I try everyday to change my attitude, I am getting better at it, but It is hard to look at a person for what they are instead of what they look like.

Besides, I cannot see myself waking up next to a woman that might have a nice personality, but whose face looks like ten miles of a Mississippi dirt road, with all the bumps clearly outlined.

Lord forgive me, but I'm just saying....

12 comments:

RiPPa said...

Its human nature. Messed up, but its the way it is. Its become so important that its even used as a marketing tool. Think about it: you never see an ugly ass female on the condom box now do you?

ZACK said...

I already wrote about this last month in How Does Being Handsome Feel? And you commented on that post, I believe.

I look at it this way.

God wanted certain people to breed. That's why NBA and NFL players get all the first dibs on women. And not all of them are tall. You got some pipsqueaks in both leagues. But overall, the tall brothers have no problem "sealing the deal".

However, Wilt Chamberlain was the biggest shocker of them all. After all that bed bouncing, he couldn't hit the target one time. Yup! No kids to his credit, which meant that his soldiers weren't marching too good or he was lying and probably liked dudes secretly. I dunno!

But other than Chamberlain, tall guys are highly likely to get married, have kids, and live better lives. And if they have good looks and a decent build, it's OVER! Cats like me can forget about it...

Kim said...

@ DirtyRed

Well I commend you on you honesty in showing how deeply shallow you are.

True people are judged by their outer appearance, but it's because people like you exist. If someone doesn't stand a chance in this world because they are deemed unattractive ,it's because of people like you,(although I'm sure Bill Gates would beg to differ). And you say you are trying to change your attitude, I hope that is not a fraudulent statement made to show some kind of redemption for the statements you have made in this post. It's kinda sad and to me a soul issue.

Now since you are calling on the Lord to forgive you, I will assume you are a believer? What do you think about the Prophet Isiah's description of Jesus? In Isiah 52:13-15 and ch. 53 Isaiah predicts that there would be nothing beautiful or majestic in the physical appearance of this future Servant. According to this prophecy, it seems that the the Messiah to come, representing all men, would be a very average looking human being with no particular beauty in either his form or his face. However, He would have an inward beauty, but not outward.

Dirty Red said...

Rippa,
You are right man. You never see anyone that might be deemed as unattractive doing advertising for anything. Unless it is a comedy about someone unattractive trying to find love.

Zack,

I don't know about whether height has anything to do with being attractive or not. I admit it definetly has it's advantages, but like I told you swagg is what seals the deal after a person gets passed the physical aspect.

And now on to Kim....

Mrs.Miss. or Ms Kim,
Thank you for your comment. I really appreciate your point of view.
However.....
I know that not everyone that reads my little ole blog will agree with what I have to say.
That is the beauty of the debate. I learn a lot from everyone that bothers to comment on my blog whether they agree with me or not. That is the main reason why I blog, to get different opinions on the topics that matter to me. That is how I learn.

But.... I will not put up with someone like you that does not know me from Adam coming on my site DISRESPECTING me the way you just did. You think I am shallow for saying something that we all think about but are to PC to say?
Did I say one time that I have treated anyone with disdain just because I don't think they are attractive? How in the hell am I shallow? Just because I would rather be with a woman whom I find attractive, (it doesn't matter what you think of her), that makes me shallow?

Please...
Did this subject hit a nerve with you?
If it did, then Boo, I am sorry for the dude that hurt you or left you for Hally Berry. But I ain't him.
So if you choose to comment here ever again, which I hope you do, leave the scorned black female at home, because Dirty Red ain't the one to put up with it.
Again thanks for taking the time to read my opinion.
I really do appreciate ya.

Hawa Bond said...

but It is hard to look at a person for what they are instead of what they look like.

Actually, I don't find that particularly difficult to do. I've been that way since I was young. You can look at my history of friends and even boyfriends and see that.

While I enjoy my moments of "oooh" and "aaahh" when it comes to enjoying eye candy, I am far more attracted to the content of a person's character.

(I happened to luck out with my fiance, who has both looks and character.). And guess what, Zack? He isn't tall at all. LOL

Oh, and DirtyRed, don't be too hard on Kim. As written, the "admissions" in your post appeared to apply to both dating situations and people in general. While I may not agree with her entire comment, and I realize she doesn't know you, I also didn't find her comment terribly inappropriate based on the info provided.

Happy New Year everybody!

Hawa, author of
Fackin Truth Blog (Personal Blog)
and
Cleanse Master Remix (Health Blog)

Hawa Bond said...

I forgot... Zack... lemme spread some love.

I still don't believe you're always overlooked based on your looks or your height. You come across, at least in writing, as a man with a low opinion of himself. Believe it or not, that is a major buzz kill for women who sense it.

If that thumbnail is a picture of you, I bet I'm right. You're certainly not physically unattractive.

Hawa, author of
Fackin Truth Blog (Personal Blog)
and
Cleanse Master Remix (Health Blog)

Kim said...

Looks like I'm the one that hit the nerve.I didn't realize you were so hypersensitive so sorry if I hurt your feelings. That i will apologize for, but I stand by my comment. I don't have trouble attracting men, no one left me for anyone, so i'm not a bitter black woman cause LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL and I have absolutely no reason to be bitter. My comment was not a disrespectful comment.You must ask yourself why you feel disrespected by the truth and Truth is judging someone on looks is shallow just like making assessment base on skin color.

Dirty Red said...

Hawa Bond,
Where have you been? I thought you had forgotten about me. That was nice what you said about my boy Zack.
He is a cool dude.

Kim,
Ma, there is no nerve for you to hit. I felt disrespected by your comment so I responded. I guess that we both misunderstood each other. But it is all good. I told you, that is why I blog. I really do value other's opinions. I am not shallow. Not by a long shot. I hope that you continue to stop by and read my thoughts, because like I said this is how I learn. I do not care if we disagree. I like healthy debates. As a matter of fact, with your permission of course, I would like to add you to my blogroll. But if you leave a comment that I feel the need to respond to, don't take it personal.
Like our future President has been qouted as saying, ' we can disagree without being disagreeable'. So Ma, I am raising the white flag...
Do you accept my request for a truce?

Hawa Bond said...

Dirty Red, {{big hug}}. Boy, I never forget about you. Lately I've been drive-by blog reading. I come by a few times a week, but I breeze out before leaving a comment.

I like my old way better, because some of the most fun happens in the comments. So I'm back to blow up your comments section. I dropped some new comments over at Zack's spot too. I had to say something about the college educated (and almost college educated) rappers. hehe

Hawa, author of
Fackin Truth Blog (Personal Blog)
and
Cleanse Master Remix (Health Blog)

Kim said...

@DirtyRed
I can accept your request but i didn't feel like we were fighting just disagreeing. I certainly meant no offense. I hink that's just a hazzard of e-communication, words typed don't have tone or inflection so it's easily to think someone is attacking you and of course I don't mind being added to your blog roll.

LeLe said...

My father has always said "Beauty is only skin deep. Ugly is to the bone."

I understand that the first thing we usually notice or what attracts us to another is what we see, the physical stuff. In many cases, it’s the other stuff that drives us away...poor hygiene, bad attitude, too many kids, bad or no personality, gold digger…I could go on and on. You see, we don’t always see these things first because we get caught up in her eyes or his smile...then the other shoe drops right on your head when she has her kids calling you daddy. Oh well…I’m not knocking it though. I believe the physical is supposed to be a factor in choosing a mate, it’s just not supposed to be the only factor. And for some people, having a trophy on their arm is all they care about. I have my own hang ups about men…since I am 5 feet 11 inches tall, he needs to be as tall or taller than me…this is hard to find. Tall men are in high demand by short and average women. Dude, I say get a man your own height!

Sometimes looks can trump a bad attitude for a short while…if something else is good…know what I mean? The last guy I dated was very good looking and the whole nine, but he was a compulsive liar who I caught several times. I stayed for a minute…but once I had my fill, I was out.

Happy New Year!
LeLe of www.aslelesworldturns.com

blackwomenblowthetrumpet.blogspot.com said...

Hi there! {waves}

I just wanted to stop by here and say "Happy New Year!!"

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland."
~ God

Peace, blessings and DUNAMIS!
Lisa

*Isaiah 43:18-19