Saturday, March 13, 2010

'Stuff White Folks do'

I was not going to write about this, but I went over to one of my favorite sites, STUFF WHITE PEOPLE DO, and I changed my mind. This is a very good site and I suggest that all of my readers go check it out. They talk about some real shit over there. Shit we all talk about amongst ourselves, but rarely outside of our circles. Believe me when tell you, it will be worth your time to check them out.


A friend of mine asked me the other day who Mo'nique is. It seems that he had watched the Oscars and he did not know who this woman was or what movie she won the Oscar for. This was not surprising to me, because I could not name many of the White Actors's and Actresses or the movies that won either.

So I told him who she was and what movie she starred in. He asked me if I saw the movie and I told him no. He asked why, since it was a Black Movie that had a Black woman that won the Oscar. He said that he thought we all supported our own.

Well this is when I started to get a little upset with my friend. I told him that I did not want to see the movie, because I did not have the desire to see another stereotypical movie about a dysfunctional Black "family". I told him that even though the movie was fictitious, White people will still believe that this is how it is in a "normal", Black family even though you could have put White characters in the movie and it would have been just as good.  I told him that White people have the tendency to believe we all come from dysfunctional families, (Blame this on the national media. Especially Fix Noise.) so this movie would solidify that fact in their minds. He got all defensive on me and said I was full of shit. Well I am not the one to argue, I hate talking to people that just will not understand. I am more of the type to punch you in your mouth and keep it moving, but I knew that this would be stupid in this case so I tried to change the subject, because I knew that if I wanted to still call this dude a somewhat "friend", that would be best.
I must be getting too damn passive in my old age...

This cat did not seem to catch the hint and he asked me about the movie Blindside. I told him I had no desire to see this movie either. Again he asked why and again I told him.

I told him I did not want to see another movie about a White Woman coming to the rescue of a Black child, as if there are no Black people that are up to the challenge. He countered by saying that unlike the movie Precious, this movie was based on real people. I told him that I realized that, but my feelings toward the movie did not change. I told him that White people seem to have a superiority complex when it comes to anything that is not White. They have to feel like they are the one and only answer. The one beacon of White light that guides the way to the truth. They have to feel as if their way is the only way and everybody else is just savages that need to be saved. And the fucked up thing is that they have convinced the world to think the same way.

Now I realize that not all White People are like this, but I have been Black all my life and I have first hand knowledge of what I am talking about.

Well my friend took offense to this and said again that I was full of shit.
As before I did not argue with him.
I just told him that he asked my opinion and I gave it to him.

We then switched the conversation (finally) over to something that would start another argument, our NCAA Brackets.

Ain't friendship grand?


Reggie said...

Who the hell is Renee Zellweger?!? I'm forever wondering that!!!

Reggie said...

You know, I said that I didn't want to see Precious for the same reasons that you stated and one of my friends of color took me to task for that. They said that I was being overly negative....yadda yadda yadda. So I ended up watching the movie online and then when The Blindside came out...I didn't want to watch it for the same reason you stated....but I didn't watch it either. I was familiar with the story and I'm happy for the brother, but I honestly didn't want to see that shit.

I was amazed to see a clip the other day of Vanessa Williams telling people basically the same thing that the whole thing was bullshit. I had to stop, because I didn't even realize that Vanessa realized that she was black. Damn, it is what it is.

Reggie said...

Oh by the way, Prescious was an exceptional movie. While watching it I realized that this movie could have been about ANY race, but I still would have preferred to see another race portrayed. But the thing is, the subject matter was fucked up and no matter which race it was about, it would have been fucked up. I'm happy that Gabourey Sidibe was able to showcase her talents.....but...I'd prefer to see more positive images of our people.

But still, Mo'Nique's performance was exceptional, I can see just why she won.

Moi said...

I co-sign and all, except for the part with your friend telling you you're full of shit.

That's when the friendship ends with me.

Marianne said...

I haven't seen Precious either, but I plan to. I don't think I understood this worry about a story involving people of your race/ethnicity being generalized, until I came as an immigrant in Canada. It's very frustrating. I haven't seen Precious yet, but I wouldn't look at it as anything other than the particular story of a particular girl.
About friendship, I guess it depends what meaning you assign to that word. I have friends who barely understand what I'm about, but, if I call them at 3am with an emergency, they would come. And I have friends who really get me, but who have ditched me in my times of need. I guess the secret is to not expect everything from one person.

Dirty Red said...

I don't know who she is either. What was she nominated for? I did not watch the Oscars, I don't watch any of those damn award shows,reality shows or talent shows. I think they are all bullshit. But that is just me.

I hear ya. This dude is more of an associate. We argue about shit all the time. But he is a good dude. It is almost like having a third cousin that grew up on the opposite side of town and you only see once a tolerate him to a point, but you don't send him an invite for Thanksgiving dinner.

Thanks for stopping by. I always thought that Canada was so tolerate towards immigrants. I have never heard anything bad about the place. I never think about other countries when I think of racism. I lived in Germany for 5 years and I felt more at home in a foreign land than I ever did here. That's a damn shame. As for friends, I think that that ole saying about keeping your enemies closer than your friends is ass backwards. You know what your enemies will do if you give them a chance. It is your friends that you have to watch. A person is never betrayed by his enemies.

BigmacInPittsburgh said...

I watched the movie Precious last night and I was indifferent with it's message.

macon d said...

Hello Big Red,

I'm sad to hear that your (I assume "white"?) friend acts like that. Not surprised, though, for reasons you spelled out. If he is white, he's been raised to think that he pretty much knows what's what, about pretty much any topic under the sun, and if he knows he doesn't about some topic, he's still supposed to act like he does. (I'm still trying to unlearn that training in myself.)

Regarding Precious, I go back and forth with it. I still haven't seen it, still in boycott mode, because I read the book a long time ago, and I can't see that the movie is significantly different -- voyeuristic black-poverty porn, at least when a white person is looking at it. I know, though, that it works differently for different viewers.

Kit (Keep It Trill) said...

I give whites more credit than being so stupid to believe all or most blacks are like this. Even the racists know better; they just talk shit 'cause they like to hate on us.

Check out the book Tobacco Road sometime; it's about a similar dysfunctional white family.

BTW, Precious is a must see movie, to me anyway. Suffering is universal, and I wouldn't (and didn't) let what I thought white folks might think keep me from seeing it. That gives them too much control.

♥PrettyPacino♥ said...

I was also in boycott mode, but i ended up watching Precious online shortly after it premiered. I don't know how I feel about the fact that I, too, was indifferent. It is sad that this seems all too "normal" in the world, but I see it from the standpoint that this scenario could be typical of any poverty-stricken community, not just a Black community.
I don't know anything about the awards and all that, because I don't watch those shows at all...but whatever Mo'nique won, she deserved it. She played the hell out of that role.

Moi said...

Good thing he's just an associate. 'Cause if not, that's a BFF you bitch-slap.

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