Friday, September 10, 2010
No Homo Fella's, No Homo
We went to an Italian restaurant before we went out to the clubs around downtown, just because you can't go to Scranton and not go to an Italian restaurant. Anyways, the food was outstanding and afterward we hit the streets to see what we could see.
My partner is an ese (Mexican guy for all you politically correct Queens English speakers) from LA. This is one cool dude. He will go up to anybody and start a conversation about anything. Oh and speaking of Mexicans,this is totally off the subject; but I have to say this and if it is wrong for me to even notice this....Oh well sue me.....
I did not see one Hispanic dude doing construction the whole time I was up there. The only people up on roofs and putting up drywall (that I noticed anyway) were White Folks and Black folks. I have not seen that shit in years. I guess I have been down here in Tejas to damn long....
Like I said my homie will go up to anybody and just start talking. We noticed a dude that appeared to be about our age walking towards us with two chicks. So my man stops them and tells them that we are visiting Scranton and we wanted to know where the haps was.
Well after we stopped them we noticed that the dude was obviously Gay. And after about 20 seconds of conversation we found out that the two chicks were strippers. Well we talked to them for a minute or two and got directions to a couple of clubs in the area and we got free passes to the club were the two chicks "danced" at.
Well since neither me or my man really dig shake joints, we told them we would pass on the passes. The girls looked kinda of disappointed with this, but it is what it is. The Gay guy told us about an after party after the shake joint closes and he told us he would call us when they were on their way there. At first my man and I looked kinda crazy at the dude because we knew this guy liked the opposite of what we liked and we were kinda skeptical about going to an after party were he was going. We did not want to be the main course of the night, you feel me? But I guess he could read our minds because he told us that there was going to be a lot of hot chicks there and he would not invite us to a place where he thought we would feel uncomfortable.
We agreed, my man gave the dude his cell and we parted ways.
We went to a hip-hop spot that was much to young for us (I swear we could have had kids up in there)and watched the kiddies get low. We stayed for about an hour and decided to call it a night.
We are getting old and can't do the shit we used to do.
On our way back to Tobyhanna we get a call from the "dude".
He asked us if we were still going out and we told him we had decided to take it on in for the night.
He sounded disappointed;he told us that most of the shakers from the club were going to be there and that the two he was with earlier had told them all about the two "fine" Army dudes from out of town.
It sounded tempting for about 10 seconds; until a vision of our families popped in our minds.
We told the "dude" we appreciate the invite, but we were taking it on in.
Well in case you are wondering what the hell all of this is about......
The point of this little narrative is this.....
A Gay dude is worth his weight in gold to a single straight man. I mean think about it for a minute.....
Gay dudes always hang with FINE ass FINE Eva Mendez looking single ladies.
Most of the ladies are either looking for Mr Right or Mr. Right Now. Either way, for a single straight man, it is like a being a kid in a candy store.
And your Gay friend always tells his girlfriends about his "fine" straight friend, which is an automatic in; because if a straight dude is friends with a Gay dude; to a female he is in tune with his "sensitive" side which is definitely a plus on any day that ends with "day". And if a Gay dude says you are "fine," then to a woman you are the equivalent of Denzel, Brad Pitt and Idris Elba all rolled up into one package. Which is another plus on any day that ends in "day".
So in my humble opinion every straight guy needs a Gay friend.
Unless of course your friend is one of those bitch-ass down low motherfuckers. If you are hanging with one of those bastards,and know damn well what he is, then you my friend are suspect too.