Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Crazier than bat-shit.....

I have a neighbor who is constantly arguing with his wife. I mean all out in the street arguing.

And I think he likes it.... Let me explain.

The other day I was out in my yard just chilling with my dog, when he walked over. He looked upset, but not too upset. I have seen that look before on the dude.

Anyways he comes over sits down beside me and goes,....

"Man I am going to kill that bitch one day."

I was like "What did she do this time, man?"

"Well I was just up stairs watching  NFL Network and she came up telling me that she was going out with her girls. I was like OK, where are ya'll going, in case I need to hollar at you for anything. She was like we are going where we are going. I have my phone. If you need me, dial my damn number. And she goes into the bedroom to grab her purse. Well that shit stepped straight on my damn nerve so I went after her and was like... I thought you had cramps? A few minutes ago you was telling me how much you hated this time of the month. And now you are all energized to hit the streets with your girls? Come on son.. What I look like to you?"

This is the part of the story that if this was me... I would have been asking any of ya'll knew a good divorce attorney in the DFW area.......

"All this time man I had a glass of Crown Royal Black in my hand. Do you know this crazy wife of mine pulled down her pants, pulled her draws down, pulled out her tampon and stuffed that shit in my fucking drink?"

Stop right there.....

Yep folks, ya'll heard that right... This crazy woman stuffed her bloody tampon into my man's drink....

Well he goes on like this.....

"Man I could not do nothing but stare at her and I threw the drink and her tampon back into her fucking face and walked out. Man I can't deal with this shit no damn more."

Well I have heard all this " I can't deal with this shit no damn more" all before..... A couple of days before the Crown soaked tampon, he called me and told me to come pick him up because  they got into it on the highway and she put him out of his own car... While he was driving!!! He walked about 2 miles before he called me. I have also been witness to her calling him all kinds of bitches and hoes in front of me and their 3 kids, so this is nothing new to me. In fact I kinda look forward to talking to the dude so I can go back and tell my wife what this crazy heffa has did.....
I know I ain't right for that.... But I ain't wrong either.... LOL.

Anyways I say that he likes this type of drama because whenever he tells me about their latest run-in, he seems upset, but it also seems like he is bragging about her ain't shit mess. It seems like he is proud of her craziness. It almost seems like he is fronting about being upset just to save face with me... Which I cannot understand.

But after the tampon being dipped in Crown.... I would have been out like a scout on a new route.

Ya'll know how expensive that shit is?

10 comments:

ShAy~SHaY said...

That's just nasty tho.. I'm shocked he didn't do anything to her though

Reggie said...

Oh she's a nasty bitch fa sho!!!

Will Capers said...

*speechless*

BigmacInPittsburgh said...

I think it's time for your neighbor to find a new home.
Sounds like his wife has issues that have the potential to escalate to something worse!

CareyCarey said...

See, sometin' just ain't right!

Ol'boy has a bigger problem than ol'girl. Why oh why would a man put up with something like that?

First, I am not getting out of my car... and walk nowhere. Now, if I went to the restroom and she drove off, that's another story, but there's gonna be hell to pay when I got home. But see, there would not be another story to tell because that love affair would be another love TKO.

If everything be true, she's crazy and he's a nut. That's some made for TV mess.

Are you kidding me, the next story will be how nobody has seen his dumb ass in a month.

Man, don't let that fool back on yo property, somethin' just ain't right. If he gets a boner from telling you his sordid love affair, that negro might be black Jekyll and stupid Hyde.

n said...

man thats disgusting
otoh, he first was like "ok" when she was goin out, then he was like "what i thought u were on your period what am i stupid?"

sometimes it takes 2 to tango,not all of the time but sometime. and if he's the sort where you gotta damn prove you are on your period to shut him up because he is sittin around drunk and mad because he wants to have sex or whatever, i can see a woman getting fed up and sayin "see,you dont believe me?damn" and doin some craziness like that


im not sayin its not crazy. im sayin i know some overbearing people who dont know how to back down and shut up till the other party does something so dramatic they cant respond


sounds like they both push each other to the brink and have a dysfunctional relationship.

Dirty Red said...

Shay-Shay,
Yep Nasty as all hail.... But like I said I think he likes shit that. They still together.

Reggie,
Again.... they still together...

Will Capers,
My sentiments exactly when he told me that shit...

Big Mac,
With the money he put in upgrades to his house....He has hooked his shit up....This dude ain't going no where....

N,
"sounds like they both push each other to the brink and have a dysfunctional relationship."
That was the whole point of this post.

Dirty Red said...

Cary,

I don't think the dude is crazy like that.. I just happen to think they are exactly like N said. I think they push each other just to get a rise. Dysfunctional. N hit the nail on the head.

Mista Jaycee said...

He too is insane! They feed it together. Whew!

Byrdy said...

I was going to say too that the man seems to be just as crazy as she is. At the same time, She is provokiing him. One day he's snapp and she's gonna be sitting there saying oh no he didn't or why you do that! I do believe that physical violence is never ok to begin with but you also have to use commo sense and don't provoke!Crazy and nasty!