Tuesday, August 7, 2012

My take on the Olympics

I have been watching the Olympics on and off since they started.

 I have been paying attention to the Soccer matches, swimming, gymnastics and of course the Track and Field portions.

 Some of the "sports" in the Olympics are in my opinion, that bullshit. Bad Mitton, Trampoline jumping, canoeing, Synchronized Diving, Air Pistols and Fencing?

 Really Son?
What's next? A Madden 2012 competition?

Beach Vollyball would be on my list of bullshit ass Olympic sports if it wasn't for the women playing damn near naked. I have one problem with it though. Where are the thick women Beach vollyball players? Where are the Kim Kardashians or the Beyonce's or even Ravon Symones? Now that would be a sport; watching all that cleavage and asses jumping and streching and leaning and bending over..... shit...


Now the women in the track and field?

 If I do say so myself. Those are some fione as all hell and back women.
Except.... And I know I'm wrong as a drive through 24 hour liquor store..(we have those in Texas)...Those women from Nigeria? They could use a little tough love from my American sisters... What? I'm just saying what everybody else is saying...

I have to say this about the men Track and field athletes.... Why do they show direct face shots of  them running in slow motion? All you see is lips and mouths flopping around.. They look like cows eating. It just takes away from the whole damn event. I have to give a shout out to poor little Tink-Tink..( If any of ya'll are Cat Williams fans then you know who I mean). That dude is amazing. He is an inspiration to not only handicapped athletes...but to all people in general. He might have come in last; but he came in. Salute!!

The women swimmers? Naaa.. Those women look like a bunch of dudes in drag. All those shoulders and flat back noassitol ass women....naaa....

The divers...yep.. They are up there with the Track and field women. Nice and shapely and thick and limber and.... just... damn.

I feel like a damn pervert watching the women gymnastic competition though. Those little girls are talented as hell, but do they have to make them look so damn...provocative? They are only tweens for Christ sakes;but they look like grown ass women!! I switch the channel when they are on. I don't wanna look at little girls like that.  It makes me feel like a character on Law and Order SVU. Just all nasty and shit.
What? I know I ain't the only dude that has thought it.

Those gymnastic dudes? Man they have to be the strongest men on the planet!! I consider myself in decent shape; but the shit those nukkas can do? Those parallel bars? The rings? The damn horse thing where they spin all around and shit? All that damn running and vaulting and jumping 50 feet in the damn air flat footed? That shit is amazing to me.

And the water polo competition? That has got to be up there with the most tiresome sports in the world.  I know I couldn't do it. I am a very weak swimmer. If I swim for more than 50 yards, I feel like I need a week long nap. But those water polo Olympic athletes? I salute you son. Even though I don't understand what the hell is going on.

This is just my take on the Olympics so far..
Have you been watching? What is your favorite sport?


Reggie said...

I just couldn't get into it, it did nothing for me.

I didn't watch one single solitary event.

Dirty Red said...

Not nan event Reggie? Not nan? Well shit...